Trying to Refocus
I'm having a difficult time determining how to even begin talking about the debacle of Sunday morning. On one hand you've got the actual series of events and how everything played out. On the other, you've got a whole mess of emotions across a wide spectrum.
So pardon me if this post ends up being a lot of hullabalooey. I just need to talk some things out with you all and hopefully gain a bit of clarity.
[I'll get to a race report...eventually. Probably tonight or tomorrow. With pictures, to boot. So come on back for that, ya hear!?]
By now, you probably know that I didn't finish the race...
...and not by my own will. Had they not rerouted the course, I have absolutely no doubt that I would've covered the entire distance.
But...they called the race. Actually, the park ranger called the race because of the weather (not the RD). While it's a decision that I don't agree with, it's one I whole heartedly understand and respect. And slightly even appreciate as they were first and foremost concerned with the well-being of the athletes.
But my day was over less than 5 miles into the run. I was in great spirits. Feeling awesome. Had a surprisingly good swim despite my horrendous sighting efforts and swimming close to 1.4 miles in the end. And I made my goal of making the bike cut off (it's my weakest discipline and I'm not joking when I say that I was the last athlete they allowed on the run course...). There were a million and a half tiny victories during the day.
And I keep focusing on 61.7.
It's not 70.3.
I am absolutely beyond heartbroken.
Beyond.
It's like reliving the Chicago Marathon from last year all over again.
I'm trying to shake this unfulfilled feeling, but it still lingers.
I've talked with my coach at length as to my next steps.
I was really looking forward to cutting back on the volume and intensity of my tri training. I was excited to focus on short distances and speed. Not this go long and slow for forever business I've been doing the past God knows how many months. The idea of having to go through a handful of weeks building again is nothing less than frustrating for me. I know it'll be worth it in the end, though.
Initially, I wanted to do the Cutting Edge Half Iron Classic down in Effingham in 2 weeks time. Last year Mike and I went down there to support my Godfather and his friends, so I was comfortable with it knowing the course. Plus I've gone swimming in Lake Sara a handful of times in the past, so I'm comfortable in those wonderfully calm waters. But Mo suggested that I won't be 100% recovered by that point. And while I feel great and uber-fantastic right now...there's a good chance I'm going to have legs of lead when I go out for a run or bike this evening.
So.
Plan B...
I'm going to be headed up north for a little race called the Spirit of Racine.
I'm trying to get excited about it. Really, I am. But right now, I just can't get amped. I don't know if it's because of the additional training looming over my head, or because it's not an Ironman-branded event, or because my folks won't be there to actually witness it happen, or because I'm still feeling ridiculously unfulfilled from Sunday...but I just can't get my heart into it.
This too shall pass...right?
All I know is I just can't leave this bad taste in my mouth when I'm hungry for the whole 70.3...
So pardon me if this post ends up being a lot of hullabalooey. I just need to talk some things out with you all and hopefully gain a bit of clarity.
[I'll get to a race report...eventually. Probably tonight or tomorrow. With pictures, to boot. So come on back for that, ya hear!?]
By now, you probably know that I didn't finish the race...
...and not by my own will. Had they not rerouted the course, I have absolutely no doubt that I would've covered the entire distance.
But...they called the race. Actually, the park ranger called the race because of the weather (not the RD). While it's a decision that I don't agree with, it's one I whole heartedly understand and respect. And slightly even appreciate as they were first and foremost concerned with the well-being of the athletes.
But my day was over less than 5 miles into the run. I was in great spirits. Feeling awesome. Had a surprisingly good swim despite my horrendous sighting efforts and swimming close to 1.4 miles in the end. And I made my goal of making the bike cut off (it's my weakest discipline and I'm not joking when I say that I was the last athlete they allowed on the run course...). There were a million and a half tiny victories during the day.
And I keep focusing on 61.7.
It's not 70.3.
I am absolutely beyond heartbroken.
Beyond.
It's like reliving the Chicago Marathon from last year all over again.
I'm trying to shake this unfulfilled feeling, but it still lingers.
I've talked with my coach at length as to my next steps.
I was really looking forward to cutting back on the volume and intensity of my tri training. I was excited to focus on short distances and speed. Not this go long and slow for forever business I've been doing the past God knows how many months. The idea of having to go through a handful of weeks building again is nothing less than frustrating for me. I know it'll be worth it in the end, though.
Initially, I wanted to do the Cutting Edge Half Iron Classic down in Effingham in 2 weeks time. Last year Mike and I went down there to support my Godfather and his friends, so I was comfortable with it knowing the course. Plus I've gone swimming in Lake Sara a handful of times in the past, so I'm comfortable in those wonderfully calm waters. But Mo suggested that I won't be 100% recovered by that point. And while I feel great and uber-fantastic right now...there's a good chance I'm going to have legs of lead when I go out for a run or bike this evening.
So.
Plan B...
I'm going to be headed up north for a little race called the Spirit of Racine.
I'm trying to get excited about it. Really, I am. But right now, I just can't get amped. I don't know if it's because of the additional training looming over my head, or because it's not an Ironman-branded event, or because my folks won't be there to actually witness it happen, or because I'm still feeling ridiculously unfulfilled from Sunday...but I just can't get my heart into it.
This too shall pass...right?
All I know is I just can't leave this bad taste in my mouth when I'm hungry for the whole 70.3...
Labels: Ironman Kansas, Spirit of Racine HIM
posted by Iron Jayhawk at 8:55 AM
9 Camper Comments:
Sorry to hear about the mess of the race. Sounds like you were doing well and most importantly having fun. If you want to do an Ironman Branded event, have you thought about doing Steelhead on August 2nd?
You know now you CAN do it! You CAN finish the bike before the cutoff! And you know you could have run it in! It is unbelievable that you have been through this twice and once you get out there again you will be able to move on. Ugh though, it still sucks. :<(
Great job for getting back on the horse and picking another HIM to kick butt in! I would be like you and HAVE to find another race to finish...no doubt! I can't imagine just giving in and saying that was enough. I don't think an Ironman branded race is that important-it's how the race is put together that counts.
It's obvious you can do this-now-get some rest...and then get your butt out there-kick butt-cross that finish line and get that medal you so deserve!
Just remember, that you were on par to finish that bitch.
It's yours, Barb...all yours.
Chin up. You'll get your revenge.
I looked at Spirit of Racine -it looks wonderful. Just chalk last weekend as a training weekend. I had 2 friends there that did not get to finish.
I'm so sorry to hear about the race. I was there (camped out at mile 5.3/12 of the run), and I really respect the rangers' decision to call the race. But to make it through 60+ miles--a distance which most will never dream of traveling under their own power--only to be told you must stop before reaching the full 70.3 is a terrible blow.
But the 70.3 is still there for you, calling your name, and next time you'll have it in the bag!
feel so horrible. i remember checking your blog last year around chicago and now this. best of luck and the weather has GOT to go your way. You've cashed in all the bad karma chips in my book
The only thing I can say is that after Chicago I had the same regrouping ... and ended up doing Las Vegas in December. Not only did I feel great during the marathon, but I had a blast as well.
It totally sucks ... but the next one will be even better. Its gotta be, right? :)
Hey,
I understand where you are coming from. My "big" tri this year was going to be Hy-Vee this weekend, then they made it a du because of the flooding. It is a tri again (weird serious of events), but I was searching for replacements when they talked about canceling the swim.
Spirit of Racine is suppose to be a great race. I know a bunch of people from Chicago Tri Club are doing it. You will really enjoy it, and I am sure you will do great!
There isn't much we can do about the weather. That is part of the trials we put ourselves through. Sometimes it is our bodies telling us no, sometimes it is the environment, but we do what we can, and we keep coming back. Yes, that is why people think we are crazy.
Take some rest, regroup, and kill it at Racine!
Dave
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